BROKENNESS... is realizing He is all we have.
HOPE... is realizing He is all we need.
JOY... is realizing He is all we want.
- Larry Crabb, The Safest Place On Earth

Arrival of the Baron and Tahoe recap

Still got lots to write about processing lessons from WCC (plus I need to summarize it to get a subsidy from my church :-))... but gonna weigh in on a few other topics first.

The acquisition of Baron Davis has re-energized the Warriors fan base. I hang out at a Warriors message board (see the link to the right) and in the last few days, the number of threads has exploded - people are actually excited about the franchise for the first time in a while. Even though I'm not a huge Baron fan, as a Warrior fan I'm willing to give him my support and hope that the team can be built up into a group that's at least exciting to watch, eventually making the playoffs. Huge amount of movement on trade deadline day... I'm enthused by the Nazr pickup by the Spurs, I think he'll do a good job giving the second unit some interior presence when Duncan needs to take a rest. This NBA season has just been a lot of fun to follow, with new stars emerging, the return of quality offenses, and a wide-open path to the title for any team willing to step up and go.

Got back from Tahoe today after a gorgeous weekend on the slopes. Aside from Karen's unfortunate accident, most everyone had a good time - the weather was fortuitously timed to give us a fresh layer of new powder but wasn't heavy enough to require chains either on the way up or down. I skied for the frist time in several years and did better than I expected, even remembering the lessons someone gave me about using the poles to get yourself into a rhythm during the turns (planting to act as a "fulcrum" and dragging to enhance balance). 'Course, since Heavenly barely had any green runs at all, I needed to remember as quickly as possible. My favorite runs are probably the long blues where you just follow a path all the way down the mountain, since you can stop at any time to admire the view of the Lake, or watch expert boarders doing tricks off jumps.

Random list of memories and quotes:
- conversations in the car with George and my coworkers Eli and Garfield on topics ranging from comics to movies to cameras to internet geek stuff to the national welfare system to the purpose of laws to home buying to societal observations on marriage. Oh, and throw in a dose of empathy for JT for enduring Joy, Andrea, and Karen on both legs of the trip... kidding!
- using shovels and rakes to clear the driveway of our cabin of enough snow and ice to park two cars side-by-side. That's a good workout.
- G bringing his kendo sword in hopes that he could duel Andrew on the slopes, to no avail. He brings a sword, but no snow gear. Go figure. Heh...
- The opposing Green team inexplicably winning four consecutive Sequence matches, largely on the strength of a roughly 3-to-1 Jack availability ratio. There's not much you can do against that kind of firepower.
- "I think Sherry is actually a spy for the Green team." -- Robert commenting on Sherry's play while on Blue.
- views of Lake Tahoe from the lifts and at the top of Heavenly.
- Enoch doing an involuntary near-backflip going off a jump on his snowboard.
- Nutella and jelly sandwiches. Mmm...
- "Dude, you're such a coward, hiding behind an injured girl." -- ski patrolman to George for hiding behind Karen on the slope while pelting Andrea with snowballs.
- "No one told me there was a jump!" -- Andrea after involuntarily going airborne.
- "Flashlight." "Where?" "It's here in my pocket." -- Brian, giving his team a "competitive advantage" in Scattergories for "things you can see in this room."
- Getting "football" voted down as a "winter sport." Two words: Snow Bowl.
- Quoting large portions of the original Star Wars Trilogy while playing "Trivial Pursuit: Star Wars Edition." Not too many crowds that are willing to try that out with me.
- Attempting to synchronize approximately 8 cameras to all take pictures at the same time on timer mode. This took us approximately 20 minutes to figure out. I probably didn't smile much for pictures.
- Visited Tomio and Alice in Davis on the way back over burritos. Lingered in the parking lot for probably 30 minutes longer than we first expected to leave.

With that, I'm officially wiped.

Messiah, I know You are there / Within, without, holding me / Messiah, I know You are near / Catching, carrying this beautiful mess - "Within a Room Somewhere," Sixpence None The Richer

I am wretched, yet I am redeemed. A beautiful mess.

Couple of short initial thoughts/takeaways on the recently-completed WCC 2005... more fleshed out musings will probably appear in this space after I've had some time to process:

- Comment I jotted down during the middle of the conference: "Amazing things happen to passionate people."
- What I should have written: "Amazing things happen to obedient people."
- "Most of you just want to experience the miracles that God is so capable of and wants to perform, without taking the risk to put yourself in a position where you need one." -- Pastor Jimmy Seibert
- Most Christians I know (including myself) are stronger in their theology than in their daily relationship with Christ. We can rattle off Reformed principles and Five Points without problem, but have difficulty carving out time each day in our busy/thinking-heavy schedules to spend personal time with Jesus in the Word, prayer, and song. If theology doesn't draw us, and by extension others, closer to Christ, then what's the point? "I have never met an effective believer impacting people for God's Kingdom who did not spend at least an hour each morning loving on God." - Pastor Jimmy
- Many Christians, and Asian Christians in particular, think that "doing things for God" is the same thing as loving God, even when it just makes you tired and does not appear to bear fruit personally or in others. I suspect this may have something to do with the philosophy of "Love Languages" that Gary Chapman developed. Many Asians come from families where parents very specifically speak just a few love languages (in particular, Acts of Service) and don't understand why that in itself is usually not enough to show love to their child. Similarly, Asian Christians overload on our Acts of Service to God when perhaps He desires that we also express love through Quality Time and Words of Affirmation. This is not yet a fully formed thought.
- The Gospel is simple - share Jesus with others. We've made church too complicated. There appears to be an artificially high standard for so-called "spiritual maturity" in leaders and disciplers (one or more of the following: seminary-trained, knows x% of the Bible, already led some other ministry before, etc.). A new believer needs to be trained how to study the Bible, how to pray, how to witness and how to disciple. Once a believer has developed a daily relationship with and sensitivity to Christ, and has been obedient to God's command during the inevitable time of trial that will follow, he/she can be a candidate to disciple a new believer by modelling their Christ-following for them. He who is faithful with a little will be entrusted with more.

That's just off the top of my head. More later after I've gone back through my notes...

Couple more quiz results

[resigned sigh] Even though I'd rather be Chandler, I guess I'm

You scored as Ross. You're brainy Ross. Once a geek and now a hit with the ladies. Hope you have enough money to pay for all those weddings! Ross 55% Phoebe 50% Chandler 50% Monica 45% Joey 40% Rachel 15% Which Friend are you? created with QuizFarm.com

But, on the flip side, woohoo! No more blond-haired elf woman!

You scored as Gandalf. You are Gandalf! This wise, old mage is loyal and brave. He is known for his counsel and advice to his friends and allies during tough times. "All you have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given to you." Gandalf 81% Aragorn 75% Samwise 56% Arwen 50% Eowyn 50% Frodo 44% Faramir 38% Gollum 31% Pippin 19% Which LOTR character are you? created with QuizFarm.com

Finally, maybe I'm not as nerdy as I thought I was...

God loves you too much to let you stay the way that you are.

An optimist thinks that this is the best of all worlds, a pessimist fears the same. - my yearbook senior quote, 1996

A few Fridays ago at youth group, I had the opportunity to take a trip back down memory lane to share a little bit about what I was like in high school. Each time I flip through the yearbooks or go through old photo albums, I feel a wide variety of reactions sweep through me. Previously, I detailed some of my experiences and thoughts in this post from last August. There's some depression at the lifeless robot I basically conformed to being. There's some resentment at others, but primarily myself, for never really developing personal relationships because I was an empty shell. I only went skin deep, placing a premium on academic performance and good behavior, like a model second-generation Asian-American is supposed to value. Thing is, because I focused on these and only these things, I never really discovered who I really was. I was pretty much a living stereotype - from outward appearances, I was a good guy, but there was nothing authentic or sincere about me, I think. Heck, even my senior quote was an attempt at being faux-philosophical intellectual, and ended up being really lame.

I found this quiz online and took it from the perspective of what I remember being like back in high school:

You scored as Loner. Loner 75% Geek 50% Drama nerd 38% Prep/Jock/Cheerleader 31% Goth 19% Ghetto gangsta 13% Stoner 0% Punk/Rebel 0% What's Your High School Stereotype? created with QuizFarm.com

That sounds about right. As I was sharing my story with this current incarnation of my church's youth group, I couldn't tell if my experience was resonating with anyone, but more than anything, I wanted to let them know that in the last almost-decade since leaving high school, God has picked me up, ripped out a shallow heart of stone, and is slowly transplanting into me a heart of flesh. He took a big sledgehammer to all of the idols I had built up in my life and reduced them to rubble. A lot of the time, that really hurt, and healing has left scars. But, ever since God got my attention right before college, I believe I've come alive as a person and a uniquely created being. I can understand a little better the value of people and the shared experience I have with almost everyone. I treasure introspection and the development of personal depth. I can see the world in the light of Christ and the big overall plan and purpose I can choose to live for. It's easier to be in relationship with others when I have a better idea of who I am myself. Whereas I used to allow pessimism to color my words, ideas, and critiques, I now realize that this was due to the focus being on me and what I had made myself to be in my mind. As I've had the opportunity to shift more of my mental cycles away from myself and onto God, life has become simpler and I have become optimistic enough that the other day, my coworker jokingly accused me of always finding the silver lining. I'd never have expected that back in high school.

I guess that was the message I wanted to tell the youth about - God loves us too much to let us stay the way that we are. He works things out so that His Name might be glorified, and sometimes it takes being swallowed by a big fish or orchestrating difficult circumstances in my life so that Jonah and I would be obedient to proclaiming His works. The great thing is that there is joy in the journey of being made new as well as the anticipation of finally being made fully into the likeness of Christ. I can only hope and pray that the youth learn this at a younger age than I did.

Random notes

Notes n' stuff from the weekend gone by...

Martin acoustic guitar with rosewood back and sides + Highlander saddle pickup = a very nice, full, resonant, and loud sound. Utilized Byron's newly-equipped guitar this weekend for leading singspiration, and while I'm content with my Yamaha, those whispers to get a Taylor are getting louder... haha.

Supposedly, one of the tricks for playing fingerstyle is to grow out the nails of your picking hand (usually the right) while keeping the nails on the left hand trimmed for fretboard work. Well, I haven't cut the nails on my right hand for a few weeks now, and while I do get a clearer sound out of the strings, the rest of the time I always feel like I'm gonna slash something open, Wolverine or Sabertooth style. I don't know how women live with long nails.

On a related note, I haven't gotten a haircut since Thanksgiving.

Does it demean gaming integrity if I, having watched Hanlin and Andy Y play "Resident Evil 4" a few times on the GameCube now, am interested enough in the story to go and read a game walkthrough just to follow the story even though I have no interest in playing the game?

At Andy/Ruth's birthday party on Saturday, Andy received "Trivial Pursuit - Lord of the Rings Edition." Based off the movie version of the story, the first several questions that we tried were rather easy, and I think Byron and I got a little cocky. Since God has both a fine sense of irony and comic timing, the next several questions were quite difficult (i.e. "Cameron Rhodes played which Shire character?" and "How many soldiers stand guard outside the Golden Hall of Edoras at all times?"). We'll conquer that game yet.

"Office Space" is such a highly quotable movie. Some of these can be inserted into plenty of everyday conversations, particularly here in the Silicon Valley:
"So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life."
"It's not that I'm lazy... it's just that I don't care."
"Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late, ah, I use the side door - that way Lumbergh can't see me, heh - after that I sorta space out for an hour. I just stare at my desk, but it looks like I'm working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch too, I'd say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work."
"We'll be getting rid of these people here... First, Mr. Samir Naga... Naga... Naga... Not gonna work here anymore, anyway."
"I did nothing. I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything I thought it could be."
"Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about about mission statements."
And finally... "Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays!"

It doesn't get better than enjoying gorgeous weather outdoors on an early February weekend playing basketball, then having the rain start only when you get to the office on Monday. That's some prime timing by the Man Upstairs.

The Super Bowl was a solid contest. You could tell which team had been there before, and which hadn't. Despite the fact that I don't like TO's bombast and the way he burned every bridge on his way out of SF, gotta give props for a truly stunning performance on Sunday on one ankle. What the heck was Philly doing huddling up with 4 minutes to go and needing 2 scores anyway?

The commercials generally didn't wow me that much this year. I chuckled at the Ameriquest "Don't judge too quickly" commercials with the dinner preparation and the convenience store cell phone mishap (those hands-free headsets are ripe sources for situational humor), and the Lay's spot with Hammer getting thrown back over the fence was amusing once (but will probably get really tired really fast). I also liked a commercial for the Toyota Prius where everything was walking/rolling in place, then the car comes in representing new technology - clever use of a techy visual gimmick. Unlike a lot of commentators and friends, I didn't like the ads with monkeys in them very much. Here are a few links to comments and lists of the commercials that ran: Detroit News, SF Chronicle, and CBS.

The deal is done and Protego Networks has now officially become part of Cisco Systems. We'll be going in for orientation tomorrow. Joining a big company is seriously like swearing loyalty to a country. Well, at least we get free drinks and access to a gym now.

Finally, a tune to get stuck in your head, just like it was mine for most of the last 24 hours:

"Naaa.... na, na, NA-na-NA-NA.... NA-na-NA-NA... HEY JUDE!"

I wonder if elves have that kind of bonus...

So the other day I was engaged in discussion with two of my coworkers about what life would be like if we were living a role-playing game, since in most RPGs, the race you are can give you bonuses to particular skills (like elves have a bonus for archery, dwarves for masonry, etc.).

Since one of them is a white American male from the Midwest, I joked, "Well, you'd have a -3 to 'Getting into a major public university' due to affirmative action."

He fired back with, "Yeah, but I'd be a +4 to 'Dating an Asian girl.'"

Touche.

Comments and Feedback...

Fiddled a bit with my blog template tonight to put links both to my faithful backBlog comment system and the one provided by blogger (designated "Feedback"). Personally, I like the fact that backBlog pops up and doesn't take you away from the main post, but it does have an annoying character limit. So, if any reader wants to write an essay - or simply something longer than 400 chars - in response to one of my posts, you can use the "Feedback" link to use the blogger.com comments, which don't have a character limit.

If you have a blog that you'd like to do something similar with, let me know and I can send you the template snippet.